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Eats, Shoots & Leaves
The following story is from Lynne Truss’
bestseller Eats, Shoots & Leaves:
panda walks into a café. He orders a sandwich, eats it, then pulls out a
gun and blasts two shots into the ceiling.
“Why?” asks the confused waiter, as the panda strolls toward the exit. The
panda whips out a badly punctuated wildlife manual and tosses it over his
“I’m a panda,” he says, at the door. “Look it up.”
The waiter turns to the relevant entry and, sure enough, finds an
black-and-white bear-like mammal, native to China. Eats, shoots, and
It’s the basis for good grammar and, therefore, written communication.
matters. Whether you think about it consciously or not, your philosophical
thinking – or lack of it – is to politics as punctuation is to grammar. Bad
punctuation, bad grammar. Illogical philosophy, illogical government.
Philosophy is the basis
for thinking and, therefore, human action. Metaphysical philosophy is the
foundation of philosophy. A is A, B is B, a wine glass is not a choo-choo
train. Epistemological philosophy is built upon metaphysics. It’s the
step-by-step method of thinking called logic or reason. 2 + 2 = 4. 5 + 5
does not equal 17 trillion. Ethical philosophy is built upon epistemology.
It’s the moral philosophy of right and wrong. It’s our legal system of
Free market capitalism
is the outcome of logical philosophy. A is A; 2 + 2 = 4; Individuals are
inherently born with individual rights: freedom of speech, freedom of
religion, freedom of voluntary association, and freedom of economic exchange
of ideas, services, and commodities. Rational society is a limited
constitutional republic. The government’s only legitimate function is to
protect individual rights, to prohibit infringements upon individual
Socialism is the
outcome of illogical philosophy. A can sometimes equal B if the Dictator
feels like it; 2 + 2 can equal a deficit 17 trillion (Keynesian economics);
Individual rights is a Marxian oxymoron of reciprocal slavery which means
everybody has the right to receive the fruits of everybody else’s labor
(redistribution of the wealth based upon altruistic “need”). Irrational
socialist society is characterized by democratic majority pilfer. The
socialist government’s function is to rob Peter to pay Paul.
Check your philosophy.
Where do you fit in?
The Moral Majority
running the Republican Party eats, shoots, and leaves the country with a
huge economic deficit. They’re Christian Socialists, preaching theocracy,
preaching the tired old Divine Right of Kings. They attack your
epistemological philosophy by substituting the mysticism of religion for
reason and logic. They substitute the moral philosophy of Deism with
Theism. Theism says there is one God who created and continually interferes
with and rules the Universe. Deism says there is one God who created but
does not interfere with individuals and the Universe (individuals have free
will). Theism is the basis for theocracy and the Divine Right of Kings.
Deism is the basis for individual freedom, the U.S. Constitution and Bill of
Rights, a limited constitutional republic, and free market capitalism.
The Democratic Party
eats your shoots, loots your shorts, and never leaves you alone. They’re
Marxian Socialists, preaching George Orwell’s 1984, Big Brother
governmental intervention. They attack your metaphysical and
epistemological philosophy by substituting the mysticism of socialist
economics for reason and logic. They substitute the moral philosophy of
individual freedom with altruistic collectivism. Altruistic collectivism
says individuals are sacrificial animals for the collective “public good.”
Marxism is the basis for socialism and the Divine Right of Dictators.
The Free Marketeer
group eats shoots and leaves. They’re free market capitalists, like natural
panda bears; live and let live. They know where to put their commas and
question marks. They know how to read the U.S. Constitution and Bill of
Rights and understand our forefathers’ philosophy behind those documents.
Both the Democrats and
the Republicans have badly punctuated political platforms. That’s because
both Parties’ political philosophies are dragging us into an illogical
government that shoots, loots, and feeds at the state and federal
Congressional pig troughs.
Like the panda story
that exemplifies the importance of punctuation to language, philosophy is
not just some ideological, nonsensical, abstract construct that we can live
without. Your philosophy is who you are.
Which one are you: the
political panda that eats shoots and leaves or the political panda that
eats, shoots, and leaves?
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